Wound dressing

There are two stages to healing a wound. First, it must be cleaned and covered. Covering serves two purposes. It protects the wound from further wounding, and it puts the wound into darkness. Darkness is the healing space where moisture is preserved in a womb-like environment for the body, mind and spirit to mend what was broken. It isolates the wound so all internal powers can be mustered and concentrated. It also keeps the wound clean and prevents spreading or worsening. During this time, the wound will begin to cover itself with natural defenses and strengthen. The second stage is to bring the wound out of the darkness and into the light, where air allows it to breath and take in healing energy from the sun. Both of these steps are equally important. A wound that is covered and never brought into the light, however, festers. That wound will grow and spread and eventually begin inflicting other wounds. When the time is right, a wound MUST be courageously brought into the light.

John Adams has a wonderful piece called “The Wound Dresser” based on Walt Whitman’s poem of the same name from 1865, inspired by the horrors of treating Civil War casualties.

“I onward go, I stop,
With hinged knees and steady hand to dress wounds,
I am firm with each, the pangs are sharp yet unavoidable,
One turns to me his appealing eyes—poor boy! I never knew you,
Yet I think I could not refuse this moment to die for you, if that would save you.”
Whitman’s poem is a story from a now distant war, and yet what inspires this blog is a young woman I’ve never met in South Dakota, who builds her way back to wholeness from the broken state of a near fatal assault. Her trauma seems to be a manifestation of life as war (see Naqoyqatsi in the Godrey Reggio/Philip Glass collaborative Qatsi trilogy). War and battle are the most overused metaphors we have: the war on terror and the war on drugs…we battle cancer and other illness, we even talk about the war on poverty. Perhaps the greatest irony is the “war on crime.” Crime itself is a war, and we fight that war with another war. One Fall, on the cover of my electric companies’ magazine, read the headline: “Time to prepare to battle winter.” War war war. Can we imagine nothing else? Is war so important to us, to pervade every avenue of our lives and society?  “Life as war” is so unimaginative. My brother Jon (Peacebuilding Global), reminded me that the opposite of violence is not peace, but creativity. Time to leave the dogs of war in their kennel and unleash the sprites of creativity. Healing is one of the most beautiful and powerful acts of creativity our body, mind and spirit can manifest!
Whitman’s poem speaks of two kinds of sacrifice: the young soldier sacrificing his life in battle over a cause, carried out through destruction, and Whitman’s ultimate desire to take the man’s place. The latter is an offer of grace bestowed upon youth by an elder. And yet no one can carry our wounds and our scars for us. We must each deal with them on our own terms and in our own time.
We have been trained many generations for war. We remember wars, we study wars and mark our history by them, and we even carry the grudges long after the wars are over. But why?
“From the stump of the arm, the amputated hand…
His eyes are closed, his face is pale, he dares not look on the bloody stump,
And has not yet look’d on it.” (Whitman)
Some wounds are so deep, that we fear to look, as if the only thing holding us together is that we survived them. What is it that causes one race to enslave millions of another? Why do we kill others to defend our own beliefs, as if the the world is not big enough for more than one view point? Why would someone assault and shoot a 21 year old woman in the prime of her life? Why? Because we have wounds in ourselves, so deep, so old, so festered beyond the physical, and so scarred over in every fiber of our existence, that we fear to look upon these: our soul wounds. Culture after culture has re-inflicted their soul wounds: the Egyptians upon Jews, Romans upon Europe, Jews and Christians upon Mysitcs and Gnostics (see John Lamb Lash “Not in His Image”) and finally, the accumulation of all those unhealed and deep soul wounds, came the hell unleashed against Native Americans in one of the largest genocides of all times, followed by the enslavement of millions in the United States. His-tory is littered with these hells on earth, but a new power to heal these wounds is being nurtured in Her-story: the warriors strength is in his tears, not her weapons. Bathe in them, and let the wind dry you off…
Justice and healing will never be served until each of us, and our societies address these deep soul wounds. Unhealed wounds worsen, fester and kill. Incarcerating and executing those who perpetuate them through violence, only postpones dealing with these wounds into the future. And we can no longer afford that because the accumulation of wounds we are inflicting upon the plant is perhaps the most dangerous of all, and one we cannot survive indefinitely.

In a vision during a sound healing for my young friend in South Dakota, the person who assaulted her came into the light. It was more than him being “found”. It was his soul wound being shown light so that it could begin to heal. In another session, I saw him lying in a puddle of his own tears, and then being dried off by the wind. The images were powerful and showed me that it is time to gaze upon our own wounds, wash ourselves with the tears that need be shed, and bring them into the open to recieve the light and air that will heal them, breaking the cycle, and launching us into “Life as Creativity” in the way it was meant to be.

Thank you to all with the courage to heal, and to those who tell the new stories.



I am 1 is a great paradox. One is both the individual and the unity. It is a new code, inspired by Bradley Loves’ article on “The Stand Down Code.” Perhaps it is a “Stand Up Code:” a call to action to “doing” and not just “being.” While guest speaking in a theory class, I was asked if I was concerned about the small audiences attending the concerts of music they were all studying at the Conservatory (I call it “concert music”). I asked him if his life had ever been changed by a single person or event (music or non-music related): a teacher, a mentor, a friend, a piece of music, and he said yes. My response was “so all that is needed is an audience of one.” There was an audible gasp in the room and one student actually said something about their mind being blown. It was as if a bell tolled in the consciousness of the whole room. I still have no idea where this statement came from. It was a message, received and re-transmitted, without thought or contemplation. I heard myself speaking, and received the message at the same time the students did. It was a gift whose tone I felt reverberate deep inside, up and down my spine. It was the truth of a completed circuit, now open and flowing.  It was the wakeup alarm of a deep calling: an activation, and a paradox of the highest order. IAm1.

I have had many mentors in my life. Most recently, in my decision to stay on the planet and fully incarnate (see Dancing in the cycle of life), Dr. Timir Bhakta ( DC, MS, PES, CES, FASA.) helped me jump off the feedback loop of trying to “release” stuff. Through his mentorship, I began to see how it is important to synergize (his label), synthesize and integrate (my labels) all that I am and have been. It was the disembarkation port of my long ride on the gerbil wheel of karma. The reason I had trouble releasing old stuff was because my soul did not want it released. In this life, my soul wants everything: all the lessons from past incarnations, all the experiences, all the pain, joy, happiness, sadness…ALL the feelings. To release them, is to lobotomize part of my wholeness. So I have been welcoming EVERYTHING (past, present and future) home to this body! It is time to be free of karma, and begin again. My Name is Earl had it so wrong…and at the same time, so right.

It takes the wisdom of integration, AND integration of wisdom, to make sense of the times we are in. It is so monumental, and yet, it boils down to taking care of things inside first. I am no good to the world if I do not take care of myself. Toby Evans, another teacher, has often helped me integrate and synthesize outer lessons into inner ones, so that those inner lessons can return to the world in the form of service. Each time I returned from another graduate course in Earth School, Toby would open my akashic record, and help me “put a focus on” that would draw the wisdom from these lessons home.

I recently got to know Barbara Stone (PhD), a wonderful “soul detective” who specializes in compassionate de-posession of beings of all ilk. She has also started working with “ET” implants. In a single session she helped me remove six alienScreen Shot 2015-08-05 at 7.26.08 AM
implants (harmful, neutral and helpful), from my field. These were anything from “study implants” designed to gather
information, to implants literally holding me together until I could heal
enough to stand on my own, to those designed to modulate my third eye (input!) and solar plexus (output!). This is the subject of another blog perhaps, but here I share the photo, which served as the header of my newsletter for over a year, where they were all hiding in plain sight. (*Note: i’m not saying the people in the photo are the aliens…but the aliens are represented by their shapes after I recolored the image) Since that session, my body has been realigning and healing at a steady rate.

These experiences have all opened my mind and heart to the point where stories, like Bradley Loves’, fall on open ears. The names we assign to these entities and experiences change over the years: reptilians, annanaki, jinn, demons, devils, angels, possession, the fall of Atlantis, the flood, etc. The energies do not. When describing the alien implant session, my sister-in-law Carolyn asked how my experience is different from the traditional Christian view of casting out demons, and the devil, or calling on Angels and God. In all honesty, it isn’t, we just use different labels. Both stories, and their terminology, acknowledge that there is something beyond ourselves acting upon us, with, or against, our own individual will.

There is a balance in the universe, as much light as there is dark. When balance between them is in order, creativity proliferates, when it is not, destruction reigns. My brother Jon Rudy (Peacebuilding Global) recently told me of the notion that darkness is merely compressed light. Shazam! One could also say light is expanded darkness. Expansion and contraction are the prime polarity of the universe, and regardless of how we tell the stories, Loves, and all my other mentors have the same message: keep contracting towards cohesion and integration to become the best “me” that I can, and THEN, expand into the world to help in whatever way I can. It is a time for service to ourselves, to each other and to humanity. The world does not need more celebrities. It needs individuals reaching out to each other and launching the “Stand Up Code” to move through this time. In lake’ch: IAm1, and with you.